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Brain go bye-bye juice refers to any number of alcoholic beverages that Peter Jackson brews at home in the privacy of his bathtub. Any one of these will satisfy your deep need to escape the misery of your own existence while also soothing your inner cheapness.

For added flavour, make these while actually bathing, alone or in groups.

INSTRUCTIONS FOR CONSUMPTIONSEdit

Beer bottle

Makes 5 gallons

  • 8-10 lbs pure raw honey (for light, delicate Mead)
(or) 12-13 " " " " (for medium sweet Mead)
(or) 15-16 " " " " (for very sweet or alcoholic Mead)
  • 4-5 gallons purified spring water (not distilled)
  • 3 tsp. yeast nutrient (or 5 tablets)
  • 1 tsp. acid blend (combination malic/citric acid)
  • 5-7 oz. sliced fresh ginger root (1 finger's length)
  • 1/4 tsp. fresh rosemary (optional, as desired)
  • 5-6 whole cloves (optional, as desired)
  • 1-2 vanilla beans (optional, as desired)
  • cinnamon/nutmeg (optional, as desired)
  • lime/orange peels (optional, as desired)
  • crushed fruit (peaches, strawberries, grapes, etc.)
  • 1 tsp. Irish Moss (to clarify Mead)
  • 1/2 tsp. clear gelatin (to clarify Mead)
  • 1 spotted newt's tail (optional, as desired :)
  • 1 packet yeast (champagne or ale yeast)

Heat spring water 10-15 minutes till boiling. Stir in honey, yeast nutrients, acid blend, and spices (rosemary, ginger, vanilla, cinnamon, nutmeg, cloves, lemon peel). Boil for another 10-15 minutes, (overcooking removes too much honey flavor), skimming off foam as needed (2 to 3 times during last 15 minutes). After 15 minutes, add Irish Moss or clear gelatin to clarify. After last skimming, turn off heat, add crushed fruit, and let steep 15-30 minutes while allowing mead to cool and clarify. After mead begins to clear, strain off fruit with hand skimmer and pour mead through strainer funnel into 5 gallon glass carboy jug.

Let cool to room temperature about 24 hours. After 24 hours, warm up 1 cup of mead in microwave, stir in 1 packet "Red Star" Champagne, Montrechet, or Epernet yeast (or Ale yeast in order to make mead ale), and let sit for 5-15 minutes to allow yeast to begin to work. Add this mead/yeast mixture to carboy jug and swirl around to aerate, thereby adding oxygen to mead/yeast mixture.

Place run-off tube in stopper of bottle, with other end of tube in large bowl or bottle to capture "blow-off" froth. Let mead sit undisturbed 7 days in cool, dark area. After initial violent fermenting slows down and mead begins to settle, rack off (siphon off) good mead into clean sterilized jug, leaving all sediment in bottom of first jug. Attach airlock to this secondary carboy. After 4-6 months, mead will clear. During this time, if more sediment forms on bottom, good mead can be racked off again to another clean sterilized jug.

When bottling, in order to add carbonation, add either 1/4 tsp. white table sugar per 12 oz bottle, or stir in 1/2 to 1 lb raw honey per 5 gallons mead (by first dissolving honey with a small amount of mead or pure water in microwave).

Get pissed!

Homemade Moonshine RecipeEdit

Ingredients:

  • 7 lbs. baker's yeast
  • 42 lbs. brown sugar.
  • 4 lbs. of treacle (is a thick, dark syrup produced during raw sugarcane refining)
  • 1 lb. hops.

Directions:

Steep ingredients in 3 gallons of lukewarm water at the bottom of a 40-gallon barrel. Fill barrel to three-quarters full with cold spring water and leave in a cool place to settle.

After several weeks, transfer to your still. You can purchase moonshine stills at discounted prices through many sites online.

Heat the pot gently until it comes to a boil. Put on the lid and seal and clamp securely. Make certain the worm is fully covered in cold water. Running water is best, if available.

The first bit made will be cloudy. Discard this and wait until the product is clear, then enjoy.

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